Start with an underlayer of humility. This is your base. It is critical.
Put each arm into the sleeves of confidence. Button to the top.
Lace up your dignity tight, double knot if possible.
Make sure you find pride that is fitted to you, and you alone.
Walk out your door with conviction.
Take the world.
1. Paying attention—real attention—to a small child. I still remember the adults who did that when I was a kid, I remember the people who do that now. They become my everyday heroes that inspire me to be a better person.
2. Loosen that lid on a jar of pickles. It’s not that women really need your help twisting it loose from the jar, they could find some other means of opening it. But they like to make you appear strong, and for that, you must appease them and appreciate that they appreciate you.
3. A breath mint - simple.
4. A brown bag. Pack a sandwich for most of the work-week and you’ll save enough for that giant TV by year’s end - just part of treating yourself better and earning what you deserve.
5. A lunchtime reservation—one that doesn’t involve a drive-thru. All those sack lunches earn you a fine meal in a steak house every couple of weeks - treat yourself and those around a little better.
6. A 50-minute CPR class - you might save a life.
7. Distance. “From 30 feet away, she looked like a lot of class,” wrote Raymond Chandler. “From 10 feet away, she looked like something made up to be seen from 30 feet away.”
8. Gratitude. It takes 15 seconds to thank someone for their time or gift. It takes 15 years for them to forgive you when you don’t.
9. A single glance - that glance. If you have to ask, it’s been too long since you’ve done it. So do it, and brighten someone’s day.
10. Five degrees. Go easy on the thermostat overnight this winter and you’ll save 5 percent on heat. Snuggle up and get close with her - she’ll thank you for it…and so will Mother Nature.
11. Checking your spelling. Because the difference between Public Relations and Pubic Relations could be your job. And really, with Auto correct and Spell check, you really have NO excuse.
12. Listening—really listening—to your uncle when he tells you, for the ninth time, about that seafood shop back in Toronto that sold littleneck clams for a penny each. Forget the clams. He’s trying for a little bit of immortality by passing along the story to you.
13. A handwritten note - email and text are too easy, and far more likely to end up in the junk folder. A handwritten note…that’s tangible, and she’ll probably keep it.
14. That last drink. If you’re drunk enough to absolutely need it, you absolutely don’t.
15. The right to remain silent. People never remember you for being quiet. They remember you for a stupid joke about a venereal disease, your boss, and a transvestite hooker.
16. Getting off your ass. When meeting someone new, you meet eye-to-eye and shake hands, which is a small way of saying, “I’m not above nor below you.”
17. Getting off your ass, period. Even 10 minutes of activity a day can drop your blood pressure, boost your mood, and prevent you from forming a covalent bond with your couch or computer chair.
18. Remember a single detail about someone else. Could be a wife’s name, or a kid’s sport, or the gum disease their hound had. Recall details wisely and you’ll be as charming as me. Screw them up and you’ll make people feel like they’re interchangeable, faceless acquaintances.
19. Remember a single date. Birthday, anniversary, plant a Post-it, set an Outlook alert, or write it on your hand in permanent marker. A Sharpie fades. Her memory doesn’t.